Its more than a year since I last blogged here. This past year, I have been so caught up in my role as an administrator facing many new challenges and frustrations, somehow, this message from Andrew is truly uplifting. .... Thanks Andrew. All I can say is, God has His good purposes and plans for each and everyone of us. In His Time.
Hi Mr Yeo
I hope you are doing great!
I've been mulling day after day about my future career. And one career option that keeps coming to mind is the teaching career. I am seriously considering the teaching career as I do think I have the passion to impact lives and value-add to their lives. And I would like to let you know, honestly, that one of the real reasons, why I am so inclined to this teaching profession is because of you. You exerted a great influence on me when you were my form teacher in secondary one. You were more than a teacher, you were a mentor and a role model. You also had great aspirations and you go all out in all you do. To top it off, I loved the way you treated CIP projects. It showcased your genuine love for the less fortunate out there. Our class, 1e7 went all out to create a mega CIP project under your leadership, not just for fame or recognition sake, but for the sake of helping the society. This is particularly in line with what God commands us to do. Amen.
In terms of Boys' Brigade, you were again my mentor. I aspire to be like you, a fun-loving teacher, who makes learning no chore, but joy. And I hope to impact other students the way you have impacted me. I am a testimony of how teaching can impact the lives of others. And I would like to thank you for your positive influence on my life.
I would also like to seek advice and guidance regarding this career option.
Cheers
Andrew Seah
PS. You have in your own way affected more lives than you can imagine, as you have been a precious instrument of God
F1. i inspire others to write narrative inquiries of their teaching practice and beliefs... but yet i can't even write a book for those I have inspired;
F2. i train others and design research on creativity... but yet i can't even find answers to my fundamental questions on creative thinking;
F3. i encourage principals to empower teachers with authentic assessment ... but yet this particular P just kept insisting the teachers must still give a defining grade with the use of rubrics;
F4. i help teachers recognise the importance of Lesson Study... but yet i can't even lead those i have partnered for months to understand what it means to 'see' learning from students' point of view;
F5. i bring educators to understand the liberating power of constructivism and learning by inquiry ... but yet my wife purchases packs of exams papers for my P1 son;
F6. i desire teachers to appreciate that education can be imaginative and exciting ... but yet my son's P1 form teacher sends weekly email to us parents on decontextualised modes of assessment- test, spelling and 听写;
F7. i demonstrate to Singapore teachers how to maintain a healthy lifestyle from my video in MOE OLIVE... but yet for months I have been walking with a limp;
F8. i exclaim that technology can transform the way digital natives learn and interact... but yet i kept editing and self-sensoring my own private thoughts for fear of backlash someday with my digital footprints;
F9. i tell others its important to help children know that its ok to be themselves ... but yet i dont even dare to share the contents of this entry for fear i stumble i others;
F10. i give creative parenting talks to other parents ... but yet i had to succumb using the cane to discipline my daughter;
F11. i long to carry my son the way i used to... but yet each morning he refuses even to say goodbye to daddy;
F12. i love my parents my deeply ... but yet i do not have the courage to say "I love you";
F13. i really want a loving relationship with my wife ... but yet I never seem to match up her standards of keeping my study room tidy;
F14. i (used to) teach others the harm alcohol does to the liver as a bio teacher ... but yet I drown my sorrows in wine;
F15. i lead worship in church ... but yet my own relationship with God is...broken.
In short ... i am a failure. F!
o ... one more F.... i have done well to help some local ministries and govt agencies take on innovation to a new level both locally and overseas.... but yet i detest the idea that i need to be back in green undergoing 20th C regimental training next few weeks for a force that claims to develop 21st C 'warriors'. So much for assessing performance indicators of success for NE!
Its been so long since i have submitted any blog entries....been just so busy. At this moment of time, I am feeling a little adverse to words like 'reflection' or 'narratives'. Yet, I just need to 'pen' this down after the past 5 hours of toss and turn, on the morning of my 36th Bday. I am not sure how I will react to this entry years later but at least, I like to capture a glimpse of an important (failed) 'scholarly' aspiration.
I had this wish for this new 'beginning'- to accomplish some good academic writing so that I can grow towards being more than a good teacher-educator but really to step onto path of being a scholar. But the email below from someone I respect was somewhat... devastating. Not sure why but this really seemed more painful then I can bear.
Subject:Your understanding and support please!
Hi John,
I had an appointment with XXX to consult her on my application for XXX and XXX. She went through my files with me and pointed out to me that she found most of my XXX, especially the major ones, were co-authored with others, mainly with my XXX as the XXX in them. One important advice she offered to me was that I need to have more single-authored publications by myself to demonstrate by this year that I am capable of producing mature scholarship independently. My XXX under way this year are mostly around XXX to be co-authored with XXX and others. So I am writing to really seek your understanding and support in my editing alone the XXX as a token to show my capacity of independent scholarship. See the XXX that I finished as attached. I will definitely be supporting you to finish the XXX with you as the XXX. I cherish our wonderful and productive XXX year dearly. Hoping you understand my current urgent need for XXX for securing my XXX as I am finishing up my XXX in a few months' time.
I just feel a terrible sense of ... disappointment? I have been very driven since end of last cohort as XX and I have had shared this vision of writing this book compiling some XXX from earlier classes and started our discussion and editing work. I do admit it's been hard to squeeze more time with the heavy XXX and preparing with the new course. But... To me, that vision was an important academic milestone. Something I have worked hard and really looking forward to.
Many questions in me... Yes, perhaps academic writing is really not my cup of tea. But then, who am I to ask for anything given I am just a seconded staff and I really ought be grateful for the opportunity to learn, grow and be mentored? I feel this extreme sadness within, though I really sincerely wish XXX well and success.
Yanping and I had a good time discussing til very late Fri night on how wonderful it was reading each of your NIs. Well, I went home to focus on my next 'presentation'.... well, side-track a little… I have been invited to speak to a group of 800 teachers on an area- creativity in education. Not to boast of how 'good' i am but to share on how 'weak' and scared i really am feeling right now. Somehow the fear of speaking to such a large audience has never been more overwhelming than this. Yet, somehow, just when I am still 'stuck' with thinking… what do these teachers want to hear on creativity… what would be helpful … what would be inspiring so that we can all be more creative teachers to inspire that creative difference in our children.
This tenuous thinking process strangely led to the question I asked you 2 weeks back- “What is a GREAT teacher?”
I revisited the flipcharts and then my Facebook postings. Truth of matter is, I don’t have a 'model answer'. (and I so apologise esp if I have misled u to believing there is..) Yes, Kok Leong's group rightly pointed out Fri night that there will always have politically correct answers while with some hidden truths. Michael was upfront to say, "perhaps John was not satisfied with our politically correct replies that’s why he posted on his facebook..." Sorry but yes, I wasn't convinced that your answers were a clear distinction between Good and Great. I suspect one attribute of a great teacher is one who dares take risk- especially in our highly conformist system. I am not implying that having the courage to take risk is necessarily the best way... but from your all your NIs, I learnt that RISK THROUGH PERSONAL COURAGE is when you dare stand up for your students when others look down on these ‘losers’, risk is when you dare admit that we are not perfect teachers yet we need to live up to the expectations of others, risk is when your students (esp to the more 'challenging' classes like NT) make excessive demands upon your time and resources, risk is when you dare admit there are times we as teachers feel scared with what you have started, but gone ahead anyway.... risk is when, you know others will turn their back against you...
I am also ashamed to say that I myself have never written a complete 18 pages NI before. Do you remember I asked you- Does winning some school or national award make you a GREAT teacher? Fact is, such awards do acknowledge your hard work. But yes,,, we give honor to the many other unsung heros. I was once awarded several awards too for a particular project on Service Learning... where I in my leadership position took the risk to give special 'rights' to do something that is different from all the other classes. I was questioned for my intentions by other teachers… but I went ahead nonetheless. This was a Sec 1 class that had MSG head over heels compared to all other classes. Yet, as the form teacher, I was saddened with this ‘high ability’ students who dare tell me in my face don't waste their time with unnecessary projects. Parents who say, let my child take a CCA take require minimal involvement as their are here to excel academically. In class, though a little fun loving, they lacked the camaraderie of other children. This was a class with an 'Attitude'! I wanted them to experience more important life lesson of humility and learning to work tog and CARING for others. I wanted them to experience that there is more than just academic excellence. I wanted this class to work on a mega-project work on Service Learning. They chose to raise funds for the Children Cancer Foundation (then, 'housed' under NKF) They worked hard to organise themselves, interacted with the cancer children and brought them to Jurong Bird Park and used their works to make into artifacts to raise funds through auction. Everything well as I planned and kids grew closer, genuinely caring for the less priviledge. In June, the NKF's TT Durai golden tap case was blown out and different ministries got involved. MOE gave a stern warning to stop all fund raising for NKF. My P called me to stop the project even though it was towards the end- right before the actual fund raising segment. I had to gather the kids and explained to them and of course to recognise their hardwork. Yet, magically, during the post SL reflection, the boy who once told me to don't waste time on non academic related project work matters, stood up and reminded the class why we did what we did. He said that while he was assigned to be Hafiz's buddy (the patient who needed to carry an oxygen tank everywhere he went) over the two days of interaction, he realised that he was so much more fortunate. This once proud and arrogrant boy said "Its not pity he wanted from us, its friendship" these words still etched in my heart til today. It was these words that got the whole class to tell me that I should not just stop this project so abruptly. I was beyond my wits. While the kids were crying becos each of them remembered the interaction they had with the patient buddy over the two days, I too was touched …but really I was beyonf my wits. After that sobbing session, the boy came to apologise for what he said at the start of the year… he shared that he was abused by his step father as a child and was often branded ‘useless’ by this step father. He told himself since than that he will work hard and not be looked down upon. He reminded so much of myself. If u remember I once shared that as a child I was violated physically near school compound and no teachers believed in my story becos I was a ‘bad boy’ who often fought with school prefects- I vowed to be a good teacher one day… and since then worked myself up both academically and in behaviour and rose to be a prefect… his convictions reminded me of who I was and why I wanted to become a teacher…
AnywAY, the class by consensus said they will take over since they know that my P did not allow this project to carry on. As 13 year old sec one students of the top class, they secretly called for a Meet the Parents Meeting and asked the P along as they presented their revised plan so that they could finish what they wanted to do. They coerced the parents to gather permission and to convince the P they will finish up their project by a month and not let their grades drop at all. Scary to say, their revised plan was even more grand than what was initially planned for... I know I couldn't support it along and yes, poitically speaking, i should not. Some of colleagues heard about it and volunteered to help and gave their time over the weakends to be involved. Even other classes (both upper and lower sec classes volunteered to support this 'grand plan'). I really couldn’t do it at all and was fearful of the repercussions every step. Yet, in the end, it was the class, the volunteers- parents, other classes and my colleagues that showed me that it was possible. In the end, this story was featured in the papers, it won awards but the credit was not mind. Minister Vivien Bala… on stage whispered “you must have been a great inspiring teacher…” but you know, I knew in my heart, perhaps it was just a brief moment of greatness with a lot of risk at stake- for which I could have been suspended or sacked from MOE for defying higher orders. But intuitively, I think I knew i just had to do it even with the risk at stake. In that lesson session for 811, one of the things I was hoping, for which none of you said, but was reflected by someone else in my FB, was the need for group learning- peer development. You know why teachers segment work from friendship- why cant departments grow becos they want to see the best in students- and are willing to unpack what defines ‘best’? I tell you… with all the work in LS that I do in schools… I outright reject schools that say, help us to show that LS can improve results…. I m sorry… improving results is a by-product. John Yeo loves John Dewey … ok perhaps I am getting overboard and pls great teachers should not get runk... This is not my NI…
The crux of the matter is….Why do you really need to bother about the final paper… let me explain from a personal perspective… I did my masters in US… I wanted to really learn how to be a great teacher (even though we are all created different) to inspire teachers to teach more creatively (because teaching is really sometimes a ‘wicked’ job)… and till this day, why I choice to b seconded to NIE even though I was given option to eb a school leader…. Becos I think teachers to recognize that their work is not in vain, tat we need to have research to encourage Singapore teachers to continue the good work we are doing. I was offered a teaching position with full scholarship in a US university… this to an Asian is a rare opportunity. To b reallllllllllllllllllllllllllllly honest, I miss being a classroom teacher, but I am clear why I m here. I believe strongly that research informs practice and we have so much good work going here in SG… I m jealous of the good work you are doing in the classroom but I know God put me here for a purpose… you know,,,, I lost my second child due to a miscarriage when I was in US… yet my good wife told me, if you believe in what you hope to do, then persist. It was a difficult decision then to stay on, I was a top student in my cohort and my research project was gaining so much traction yet…. I believe sincerely that the way this final paper was crafted…. with all my heart that this VISION paper will be something that its all worthwhile as you truly seek for your own navigator. Look beyond the grades and write it ONLY FOR YOURSELF.
I feel sad. I feel sad that this is the last sem I am teaching 811, that I will miss the wonderful learning from each of you. Perhaps, unlike other modules where there is plenty of 'know-hows', just like Borko (2009) says a wicked problem has no one correct answer, that its contextually bound, dynamic and interrelated. May your time invested in the group project and final paper be a personally meaningful and fruitful learning experience. While I continue to think about how may I challenge these 800 teachers to greatness (I m not proposing that creative teaching as a mainspring of greatness)... yes, this was also part of my own vision paper- to inspire teachers to be more creative educators. I just like to thank each and everyone of you for such a wonderful learning experience for me in 811.
Before I close and perhaps to sober up to think about my 800 teachers presentation… teaching is an emotive work… why did you think I trick you into opening up and talking about the emotional labor of teaching in session 3… o my goodness…. Before I regret doing what I m doing…. Pls know I sincerely looked upon you as my friend n teacher in 811….
Sincere thoughts and blessings
JOhn
P.S. in Chinese… they say.. jiu hou tu zhen qin… after wine, is where find the most ‘real’ you. I know it’s a risk, but hey… I don’t really care… I just wish for each and every one of you to aspire greatness in what you can do and will do as a teacher and school leaders…. To me… there are just too few great teachers around. May 811 take you along for your journey of your Greatness..
I was talking to a close brother in Christ- Edmund Nai on prayer and I found it easy to ask him why I often felt so 'distant' from our heavenly Father. He asked me in return- "What do you teach about when someone asked you how to communicate effectively?" Interesting as I could sense where he was leading me with this abstraction exercise. I listed the following: Need to be honest and real, genuine interest to discuss, keep an open mind, active listening, waiting, pacing, body language, willingness to accept no response, not be judgemental, etc. The logic than became a clear fit for me- have I practiced the above if I was genuinely communicating with God. Wonderful points of reflection! Hearing God's voice was something we desired and he shared the need to have a strong desire and pure heart, laying aside our pre-conceptions and focus on communicating honestly with God as a process for spiritual growth.
Before we closed, Edmund invited me to close my eyes and ask- "What does God FEEL towards me?" I clarified- 'think' OR 'feel'? Yes FEEL was the focus. In order to 'feel close' as that should be nothing that can hinder us from the love of God since the redemption has already been paid on the cross. I was excited and ready, but was I really ready? I prayed and asked but somehow, was unable to clear the olfactory, tempting, distraction- wonderful fragrance of chicken rice that someone was dining in a nearby place. Quite shamefully, I opened my eyes and confessed that I was distracted .... by the smell of chicken rice. Edmund in that instant shared that he actually felt the urge to remind me while I closed my eyes that sometime God uses the immediate images to speak to us- and this had nothing to do with the chicken rice then. He indicated that since what he felt was exactly how I was 'stuck' in that moment- perhaps that 'smell' was so distinct and it really did not happen by chance. And perhaps this was also God's creative way of speaking. I closed my eyes and asked again, "God how do you feel towards me?". This time, the smell reminded me of how much I delight in food and that immediately connected to how God delights in my happy giving- giving to others, to enjoy fellowship or simply being who I really am- a happy and creative individual. I found peace in this strange yet comforting sense of understanding and chose to accept it. The next moment I opened my eyes, the guy eating the chicken rice had already left.
This unusal yet powerful experience was a timely reminder that we serve a very creative God. While I often teach others to use the Visual Connections as a creative strategy to find new ideas, little did I know that God can use the same trick to enlighten me too! If God places in me a desire to seek for novelty, than the Father of all Creation can use this same disposition to creatively connect with us- in a way that is most easy, comforting and close to our hearts. Unusual yet, beautifully meaningful at a personal level.
Creativity is the ability to look at the ordinary, and see the ... extraordinary.
I posted this on Facebook last week after a conversation with Joshua.
On my FB wall, I wrote- Son just asked me-" 爸爸, u r a science teacher, can u tell me why my teacher say when we put our underwear in the freezer, it can help save the earth?" I m trying v v hard to defer judgement.... What should I say ????
Frederick Chong Tell teacher,"My daddy tried but he's no superhero still.."
Thursday at 10:45pm · ·
John Yeo Good one Fred... Thanks for reminder. Now to go look for my red cape. Maybe my old and torn crocodile undies be helpful too...
John C Lim i really would like to know what is the teacher's answer to that remark. If he/she cannot give an acceptable answer, MOE should need to answer parents what kind of teacher they had employed to
Thursday at 11:24pm · ·
Loo Kang Lawrence Wee not everything people say is true. Decide and verify yourself the validity of that hypothesis
allow me to rephrase. "kids are kids. they are in a learning mode. They will absorb what their teachers teach to be true. It is good that Josh will ask Teacher Daddy, but not all parents pay extra attention to what their kids learn, and for... some when parents ask, they simply do not respond, so, the children assume what they learn in school is correct. My daughter will came home one day and argue with me about 'rain rain go away', because the tune was somewhat out of rhythm, i corrected her. Her reply was, 'no, teacher teach me is like that'. so, kids accept what their teacher teach to be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Of course if we are talking to a secondary school kids or jc student, they are already at the stage where they know how to judge whether the teacher is teaching or joking. but at early childhood teaching, for me, age between 2 up to, even primary school, primary 3-6, we cannot expect children to judge accordingly. So, if there are teachers who teach such things, we as responsible parents should be ask what kind of teacher is that? and we should also ask, whether Singapore is really in a state of shortage of teachers, when we should take in 'tom, dick and harry' to teach our children? (of course, i had known good responsible teachers but this one is a black-sheep among the white ones.)"See More
Wow... Thanks for the very thoughtful comment guys. Interesting it's all the daddies staging this discussion. I think it's a matter of perspectives. Firstly, from a child's perspective, did he interpret what the teacher said accurately? At ...the very least, the teacher was highly successful in helping the child inquire about some scientific principles. There is a high level of logical reasoning involved here and I sincerely celebrate that the teacher was able to stir the curiosity of the young mind. Hypothetically, what does it mean to 'save the world'? Look at the quick connection Fred made immediately in his first comment. Rather then passing off as thinking it was a silly joke, is there value in verifying that question? Digging deeper, could there be certain excretory substance that contain some catalyst that can be activated below zero degree c? Ever wondered how Viagra, penicillin, or post-its came about? From a parenting perspective, I am more curious to ask my wife why she wanted Josh to ask me that question- was it stemming from an intent of ignorance, of wonder (and amusement) or of (loving) trust that the scientific father may know better??? Now I am really curious ....See More
I can't help but think everyone is over-analysing this simple statement. 1. Cold gonads, less thinking of reproduction, hence less over-population.
2. Cold gonads, prolonged sensation of feeling cool, hence less need for air-conditioning (think electricity, heat, fossil fuels)See More
23 hours ago · ·
Allan Yeo wow i need to hang out with all of you more. Science out of my area and after reading this post, i've already learnt so much more about my freezer
13 hours ago · ·
Sometimes you really never know what social media platforms like FB can do in terms of knowledge co-creation. From the above discussion, there was so much to learn about critical and creative thinking and more importantly, how people can read/ misread information. All said and done, I am lurving it!
The following story received was an encouragement during days where I felt constantly 'heated' while roving on the roads. I was 'hateful' of so many different drivers- those zooming past recklessly, those far too slow-and-steady type, the lady drivers who don't seem to give a hoot of external road conditions. I always ended feeling angry. I may only drive a humble red Honda jazz but this still serves as a timely reminder.
A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door!
He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot where the brick had been thrown. The angry driver then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kid and pushed him up againsta parked car shouting, 'What was that all about and who are you? Just what the heck are you doing? That's a new car and that brick you threw is going to cost a lot of money Why did you do it?' The young boy was apologetic. 'Please, mister...please, I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do,' He pleaded. 'I threw the brick because no one else would stop...' With tears dripping down his face and off his chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car. 'It's my brother, 'he said 'He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up.'
Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, 'Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me.'
Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair, then took out a linen handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts. A quick look told him everything was going to be okay. 'Thank you and may God bless you,' the grateful child told the stranger. Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the boy! push his wheelchair-bound brother down the sidewalk toward their home.
It was a long, slow walk back to the Jaguar. The damage was very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented side door. He kept the dent there to remind him of this message:'Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!' God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts. Sometimes when we don't have time to listen, He has to throw a brick at us. It's our choice to listen or not.
From a very special group of fun loving yet hardworking students, the poster and the shirt were some of the most sentimental farewell gifts I received many years ago. Unfortunately, the poster needs to be taken down from my study room after all these years. Thank God for technology and how Blogs can help preserve memories....
Sigh... This was indeed a very special class to me. The unforgettable 2N1. They were initially a pretty tough bunch to motivate them to learn Science during Sec 1. However, getting to know their interest better, I realised that the best strategy was simply to find wacky themes that were related to the topic I was teaching.
I can vaguely remember some of the topics:
Using Super heroes on learning about the physics topic of Forces (yes, I wore a red underwear outside my pants to class);
Frying Chay Tow Kway on learning about Heat Changes and
Playing with Lego bricks to build sperms and eggs to learn about sexual reproduction.
It was definitely pretty wild to teach science back then with such crazy ideas. Thankfully, I managed also to 'wow' them.
Shortly after I left the school, the class appeared on the local news ...
http://www.gazotube.com/pN0zS9XgWoQ.html
BUT little did I realise, I was also 'posted' onto youtube ...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vNHrrvoGxE4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hjj912yQpSE&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNrDEi6Dd54&feature=related
As the students have all graduated and moved on in their lives, I can but only cherish such fond memories of the days I was still a classroom teacher! 2N1 rockx!!!
From Super Yeo... presenting my 2 little Super Heros!!!
Was deleting Air Supply's "Goodbye" from my list of ringtones and the lyrics lingered. After more than 15 years of sticking faithfully to Nokia, I have decided to abandon ship for a new found love- iphone.... (now waiting to lay my hands on iPhone 4). However, with my last Nokia E63 I had a habit of collecting some of the more meaningful/ interesting/ crazy/ encouraging/egoistic sms-es. Here's my attempt to re-capture them before I bid these memories a final sayonara..then re-adjusting to the new sms interface in iphone.
My Favorite SMSes - Stored Memories in Nokia(in nearly chronological order-bkwds)
From my wife- On my ups and downs from June 2009 to May 2010......
"Pls also honor your work by doing well too. Love you"
"Hubby, you got 2 lots of dbs@ 15.30 and 1 lot @15.02"
"After what u did, I m falling very much in love with you again"
"We are alright. Yr son didn't want to speak with you. I guess he is upset and misses you. He told me he feels like crying in school but didn't. Then he told me he's a good boy."
"You are most welcome. I stayed up to wait for you although sleepy. Because I missed you and your supper... ha ha"
"Don't be. Whatever difficult times and impossible, we (with our helper) have coped through those times. There is no mountain too big to move. You can do it and will be bk to SG next wk. Why don't you go out and hav some fun... lonely and freedom days for you going to b over soon. We love you. Joanna is better already. Thank God!"
From F* (NIE MLS student, I/2010)- On my teaching style ...
"I've always thought u have your unique ways of connecting with people. And beyond the intellectual facade, you are a very interesting fellow- a very real person with good witty humor."
"You are amazing. What you shared in class earlier was so enlightening. Thats what made you stand out as our tutor! Oh... $ the big flashy smile... how do you keep that smile when you are teaching a half-dead class from 6-9pm???"
From L*, MEd student in 811 (HOD, Sports School, I/2010)- Writing his Narrative Inquiry ...
"Thanks for the email encouragement ..."Overwhelmed by complexity" is what I'm facing now...it is much easier to comment on pedagogy or critique research than to confront myself (and back it up with literature)"
From Z*, MEd student in 811 (LH, B** Pri, I/2010)- Drawing courage to confront a professional dilemma ...
"It has always been a privilege to be challenged by you... thank you for always provoking us to think in so many more dimensions. After yr class last night, I realised that my students are the ONLY reason left for staying in the service. I may decline the promotion but at least I am clearer why. Thk u John"
From K*T*, MEd student in 811 (Dover ITE)- Just a random question I guess...
"If d bottom line for bizs is profit, what is d bottom line for public schs?"
From M*, MEd student in 811 (Pre-school business owner) - Her reflection of the class...
" Definitely its a learning journey we take together. But self-disappointment is somethg th needs to b addressed in the process. It was a pleasure to cook for you all. Won't take up any more of yr time... Anyway, ur feedback and post essay thoughts gave me some ideas on how to further my business. Thks...Sleep tight"
From T*, (MLS student) ... (something i can't really remember) ....
"Refer to the tree metaphor you drew in class. Maybe u r at a stage of deciding whether u shd grow a new branch?! Or graft another species?!"
From J*, MEd student in 803 (Nanyang Poly lecturer) -Group's presentation ...
" Thank you john for being sensitive. Honestly, I realised thgs didnt turn out as we planned. The grp spent many hours trying to find our how we can put our journey together. I enjoyed the process n realised my own gaps in my professional learning, n d gifts i brought to d grp learning. Just a qn, my ideas about a future curricula i admit is radical, bt i wake up every morning knowing deep in my psyche that this is my purpose in life. I just dnt know whr to channel this belief towards. There are far too many challenges leading my dept... I wish you can be our advisor, can?"
From Siew Huey - How CPS revealed some deep 'Ahas'...
"Oh I also wanted to thank you for the insight - that we should focus on creating solutions that we have direct control over rather than attempting to change our clients. I'd been taking that latter approach and frankly, it has been very exasperating. So basic yet so easily overlooked!"
From Helen, student I taught 10 years ago in Temasek Poly- Hopelessly 'jia lat' at work ...
" Dear God, bless uncle john with extra grace to go thru this, extra productively to faster complete the work, extra strength to carry on, extra rest to feel refresh and extra joy to replace any depressive feelings and extra dose of your presence too! In Jesus name we pray, amen! :) Jia you... ha3. I'm also saying tat prayer for myself as well, while tearing hair liaoz..."
From Kay Yen (NUS buddy, Zoo-mates, my best man, Josh's presch P) - Joshua-my son...
" ... and so Joshua said, "Are you strong Mr Kayne?". "I think I am.", I replied. "I think I'm stronger, because I'm wearing power ranger cloths today." :)
"Your boy has yr creative streak, and shows consideration for others too. Think he got good alleles man. Good job dude. I believe he can rise to the occasion."
From Carol, Godly sis since MOE 07- Our 'unofficial' marriage and family counsellor ...
" You can pray! There are many things we cannot do but only He can! Esp when it comes to issues dealing with the hearts of our spouses. Have faith! We can move mountains if we hv faith as small as a mustard seed. Speak to the mountains of hopelessness and hostility and command them to be removed in the name of Jesus. U r the spiritual head of ur home, and u hv been given much power by God to lead ur family. Ur children need ur spiritual covering. This is spiritual warfare at work. Visualise a peaceful morning at home- Everyone waking up with a smile. U praying for each one after breakfast. It may involve u being more involved with the morning routines. Or there may be children's christian music in the bkgrd to help build energy into the kids and the home atmosphere. Or reward the family with a treat when there is peace. Many creative ways to set up the home to achieve the outcomes u want. It all starts with prayers and vision :>"
"Remember to PUSH... Pray until Something Happens, my fren."
"Hi John and Van. It's always a pleasure to hang out with ur family. U r blessed with great kids. Its a huge milestone when our kids enter P1 and I had my share of anxieties. I was reminded that my kids are not mine, but His. We r but stewards, specially picked by Him to raise the kids. He entrusted into our hands. So, he will give us wisdom and guidance on how best to raise His kids. He will plant the right pp in our paths and open the right doors at the right time. So long as we stay close to Him and lean on Him. He has blessed me in my parenting journey and He'll bless you too. Cast yr cares on Him."
From Carol - Parenting Talk on Creativity...
"I m planning for another parents meet-up at Grace Kids. Is there anything in ur heart tt u wish more parents should know and tt u cld share with them on? Nurturing creativity? Thinking skills?"
From OTT (ex-colleague in CPDD) - Review on creativity workshops & Apple-s...
" Bro, how r u? Just 2 let u know that the creativity workshops were well received. I did 2 runs. Btw, this message was sent from my new iPhone, impress? Thinking of getting a MacBook now, leaving the pc camp, middle age crisis, I suppose...."
From Vara (ex-colleague from LL1) - God's blessings for my new job...
"As you begin a new season of yr life I pray for you God's blessings. May you find favor with oyur leaders and your peers and may you grow to be a blessing to others in yr new workplace."
"Psalms 84:10-12. If God has said no, He has a good reason. Trust Him :)"
From Martin (ex-colleague from LL1)- 'OP' during a CPDD seminar...
" Fluency: ME- Clearly comfortable with language but some mumbling and slurring at end of sentences. Awareness of Audience: EE- Excellent eye contact, appropriate hand gestures, effort made to scan and address whole room, friendly, and confident. Dullness of content not his fault"
From Cindy (ex-colleague from LL1)- Challenges in Action Research...
" I've been struggling with same qns. I think like what we agreed, motivation to succeed (leading to hardwork on students' part) is the basic reqmt w we hardly can observe from lack of commitment to task. WE team works cos the blending of diversity needs boys to hold onto their beliefs, views, and bring them to gp. That's why we even hardly observe friction due to difference in opinions cos this lack of creative abrasion may b necessary to bring about productivity n that may lead to creative products due to synergy from interaction. Th said, it illuminated for us some essential reqmt for WEteams for education n this ripple effect observation in itself is results for our initial hypothesis."
From Lyvenne (ex-colleague from CPDD) - Missing me?!!#! ...
"I think you and yr team did such a great job your presence was sorely missed. Thank you for re-energising the whole CPDD... you sure kept Ms Ho dancing and leaping..."
From a G* (P of a eastern top sch) - Managing teachers and credibility...
"This is my pet peeve... I will be like "Do yr job well b4 we talk about welfare. Cos those who r great relationally in my sch tend to suck at credibility! One reason why sending me bk to *** is not a grand idea cos I have a reputation as the empress dowager even as a HOD. Anyway I v stressed... am curious abt upping my social part. Those are some of the issues I struggle wif w is y i tend not to place emphasis on social when the so called 'core' isnt done. But then again, you are somewhat correct- to others, the 'core' might be the social aspects."
From Mark (SH, St Gabs Sec)- Stoning....
"If no pebbles, cannot appreciate ripples. Somebody has to be the stone. I kinda fit that description well. Today I super stone."
From JJ- Thoughts creativity and brainstorming ...
"Visuals serve as powerful reminders of basic trigger point- explicit about its edge. Celebrating the experience rather than product (high touch) invite clients to experiment n create their own experience. Cold stone ice cream- this is where u get to invent yr ultimate indulgence. Same raw materials but mixes in somthg original n memorable... co-creation and empowerment."
"Changing the behaviours of small parts of experience can make big difference- So what r we generalising about behavioural preferences? Eg. Turning public toilet exp inside our- see thru 2-way mirror. Defining element is the experience."
"What's the big deal w style over substance? Selling a mood n sensibility wrapped with design, story telling and humor. Results- market appeal proved its point. SO what's dull? Its only as dull as yr imagination."
From Ai Noi (ODD)- Thoughts on Workshop...
"ha3.. can see dat u were tired after the workshop. :) U gave new light to the common tools, thats my greatest takeaway. Dat there is more than 1 ay of using and lookg at these tools. Also discover we share some similar perspectives towards curriculum and pedagogy. Many of folks commented that you are highly reflective person and yr experience really was v helpful to all of us.. thanks!"
From Peggy (TN)- Joint consultation with SCGS...
" Thanks John.. I leArnt so much just watching u in action. I particularly like yr composure n professionalism. I think i m ADHD type of tr. U r v reassuring to e trs. Good content knowledge and if since u could use so many strategies of engagement, u got all the lady trs go ga-ga over you. U win liao."
From Edwin (old old friend and creative collaborator) -Library book...
"Can you pl help me borrow a book 'Curriculum Theory: conflicting visions and enduring concerns' by Micheal Schiro. I can come to Punggol to get the book from you."
From Moses (my other creative collaborator)-... I can't remember ...
" Was riding on the shoulders of giants. Or maybe as they say, great minds think alike. And fools seldom differ. Ha3!"
From Dianna L (old dancing partner in Synergy NUS)- Secret research ...
"What r u, edwin and moses plannin- sounds mysterious and exciting. Anways, be awesome! Vincent is holding a health talk, come if you can"
From Yan -On something v interesting but I can't remember the context ...
"Btw, I told ed abt yr wish to have another kid. He says u dun hav to wait 40yrs or when u r 40. Just wait another 40days."
From George Lim (Crusade bro in NUS) -Temptation ...
"Its not easy, and we have to keep trying. There are 3 phases to temptn: 1. your heart desires. 2. you try to rationalise whether or not to yield to it. 3. you test it out... once pass phase 2, chances are there is little turning back. So, once you recognise you're in phase 1 or 2, quickly curb it. No temptation has seized us except what is common to man. God will not let us be tempted beyond what we can bear. Lets FLEE from Temptn tog!"
From Carol - .My struggles during my studies ...
God is stretching u and thru the process strengthening u. Its also a chance for everyone in family to grow and better understd their capabilities. Be assured that everything is under HIS control. He has a good plan for you and yr family. Stay the course my fren. "
From Weixiu - More on struggling abroad during my studies...
"Be strong k? He will take care of u - Josh will grow up to be a man like u taking care of mum and sis"
From Hong Li - Family disputes...
"A word for both you and me. Deposit your love bank, not withdraw. Van love john for God. John, listen to your wife for God. Not easy for both of you. But I know God's miracle will happen in your marriage. Let your marriage work out in Christ. Pray for one another and the children."
From Ban Heng (Friend and colleague in RVHS)
"I guess relationships take time to build. I am learning to let God take the centre focus, and direction of our lives. Treasure all that you have and hav that total dependency upon Go to have real contentment and peace and rest."
As my ex-preacher (now a missionary) shared her struggles with bringing up her adopted baby in China, I am again tugged in my heartstrings for parents with similar challenges. Below is my reply to her capturing some of the recent thoughts on this issue.
Hi LK...
Last week I tried something you wrote in your last letter. I bought a Christmas cake so that I could bring some cheer to my Joanna and Joshua. Like what you wrote, I shared the Christmas story again before we sang the Happy Birthday song to J.ith the kids. That said, that night was good as the kids were attentive. Sadly, I was not able to move on... to the growth and development of J. Several reasons really- I was away the second night to continue the story, third night kids were 'sick' of the cake and perhaps the story part II and III. sigh. But thanks to you, I am glad it was a start that I could take the opportunity to keep talking more about J. with my two precious little j-s. HOwever, I think the kids got it that Christmas is not about only presents and party, cos at least for my Joshua, he was quite 'in-tune' during the church's Christmas celebration.
Your two recent letters spoke to me as well cos little joanna was quite ill last weekend and it always strikes the heart of any parent with such instances. Didn't help that I was praying for a friend's son who was born on 12 Dec but had to be hospitalised since then. I am thankful God answered prayers cos baby Aden finally went home on the 28 Dec! Reason I am sharing this is that I am thankful God brought you on this journey of parenthood. Its never easy and when you shared about how you felt like the Israelites unhappiness in the wilderness, that really spoke volumes of our humanity and how often I personally struggled to hold onto our heavenly Father's hands. As Wenwen continue to grow, I know that the many surprises and joy will fill your heart just as it does sparkle that love for Vanessa. Right now, she is undergoing the phase of the kids' "stickiness" to her.... (makes me wonder too how not impt the role of papa is). I think thats where the test of motherhood is while the kids are still young. Am happy too to read of your alibi's fellowship. Maybe its an age thing but this sort of company and just knowing that there are close friends whom you can bond with in terms of exchange of parenting tips sure helps. Be grateful for them just as I am always grateful to the 'mother club' in our service. At least it keeps my wife sane for a few precious hours! You know, its a bit hard to remain 'Christian-ly' in our fits of fury and frustrations (and now I know why God kept giving us chance after chance). I completely (and helplessly) empathize with Van on the moments when she just needs to let 'steam'.
On Christmas morning, my cell group planned for a get-together. I was both looking forward to the event not only for the fellowship but also to draw near to our Father that morning. In fact, on the way there, I even told Joshua in the car that God spoke to me to encourage Josh to seek him as J said to do unto those who need help. Alas, on the way, I knocked into a motorbike and the instant of being caught with my car plate noted by an on-looker left me frightfully running away after shifting the bike back in position. So much for getting ready to worship God and leading the rest into a time of fellowship. While strumming the guitar, I felt so 'unreal' and the topsy turvy feeling was very distracting. On the way back, after praying with Van, we decided to do the right thing and go back to put a notice on the bike to ask the driver to call me. We prayed for a 'kind' driver and true enough, God again answered our prayer and the driver returned call and was kind enough to settle with some repayment. We were glad we did the 'right' thing.
Anyway, welcome to the parenting club and don't despair in your parenting journey ok. Fact that you are doing all these in PRC is already something deeply admirable and highly respectable. Praying for you and your family!
I was very disappointed with myself last Saturday. An idea that I have been conceiving for months to create a Facilitation Tool kit and market it commercially went 'Boomz' upon realisation that a similar product was released very recently in US. With the past few sessions of workshops for different clients and schools, I realised that there was immense power with non-verbal visualisation that I harness during brainstorming with groups. That said, I was ready to collaborate with a SK who is a pretty cool photographer. We brainstormed several ideas to make this kit a holistic package for various purposes and were excited with how we could develop this commercially. We were ready to submit our joint proposal for a entrepreneur award with funding to prototype our concept. Over the weekend, I felt that my months of excitement and ideas just went down the drain when I read what the newly released package had to offer- the same ideas that I had. Can I re-focus to develop something better? How might I work on the new idea now that I know what are the various resources I have?
Thanks to Kerry Flowers- for your timely dose of humor. I guess I just have to wait for Noah to come back to pick me up...
One of my personal highlights of 2009 was to be invited to speak in a Global Brain Summit in Vail. After the last couple of workshops/talks in China, Hong Kong and Malaysia, I was wondering if God would be stretching me further in this new role. Yet, I know that with every single presentation I present, the amount of pre-work invested was tremendous. Take for example this talk in Vail. As I recalled, the 5 days prior to arriving in Vail, I was up every single night working and re-working on my slides while giving up on a much needed sleep, not to mention overcoming the jetlag from the 24 hours of flight from Spore to Denver. That said, I knew that my hardwork did payoff afterall as the social red brain was gleaming with joy from the feedback of the participants. Yet, I was searching for something deeper, if God will is for me to bless others with the words I speak. I needed to find an alignment: Who am I really onstage and offstage? What do I have to offer- more than inspiring others with my passion and my ideas?
As I was seeking an answer, a friend offered some insights. In an email conversation, we talked about several issues and learning points. Here's an excerpt from my conversation with a dear friend, Edd Brown (thanks EDD!):
You are a great and enjoyable spirit. Your zest for life is infectious. You have a great presentation style. Let me quickly say that what I liked is that you took who you are in regular life and put it right up on stage. You were not a different person on stage as many presenters are. You have a natural gift that draws people to you off stage- and you were able to carry it with you on stage.
Off stage, you project a joie de vivre while simultaneously projecting confidence, warmth, competence, passion, respectfulness for others, and a belief in what you are doing. You are able to convey that on stage as well. That is so rare! (Brothers-in-arm: Joshua, Colin, Edd, Perry, and me)
As I continue to ponder on my style, regardless of the format, I always seek to teach creatively. And what is more important to me is to plan my delivery to not only keep the participants' attention but to design in such a way to cause learning and retention of content to take place.
"Don't just throw the seed - grind it, bake it, slice it, and put a little honey on it." - Charles H. Spurgeon
Before I left for US, I was very anxious and sad that I will be leaving my wife alone to care for the two kids, especially when my domestic helper was granted her well-deserved Hari Raya leave. Yes, I was the undeserving one actually, but the opportunity to speak in an international conference was too good to resist. Yet, as the days drew closer, I was wondering if I was really irresponsible to have accepted the invitation while leaving my dear wife to fight her own battle.
This prayer was from a fellow sister-in-Christ from MOE. It reminded me that our heavenly Father will be there, in whatever circumstances.
Father, I want to thank you for the Dads out there like John. His heart is for his wife and children. Purify him and deepen his love for them as you so often do for Dads when they are away. May he he be faithful to take the time on the plane, in his hotel room to be still before you and hear Your guidance for him.
Be Vanessa's strength. May there be many joyful moments of extra closeness as she takes over the usual tasks done by their helper. May she and her mum draw closer together as they care for the little ones. May this be a chance for Vanessa to increase in ideas and confidence in caring for the kids as is so often the case when there are stretches of 24/7 with them.
Please protect the little ones. Please, by the power of your Holy Spirit, teach John new ways to pray for them as he thinks about them from far away. Please keep them from illness and injury. Thank you for Joshua's spirit of helpfulness and his parents' wisdom in giving him this washing uniform task. May he and his mei mei grow in wisdom, in stature and in favour with You and with people.
In Jesus' Name, Amen
To Lucy, thank you so much for speaking the prayer straight to my heart. It not only affirmed me then, it also encouraged me to continue to be a good husband and father, for the rest of my life!
The following emails from a new friend- Joe Moreira, managing editor of Ocean Geographic, are truly uplifting and amazingly pierced directly into some of my innermost thoughts and emotions. Reading them over and over again somehow mysteriously renewed some aspirations and ignited some of my deepest reflections.
3rd Sept. 09
Hi John!
How lovely to hear from you! Was a tad disappointed when I did not hear from you, for you certainly aren’t from the common ‘civil service’ mould; it’s not flattery bro, it’s the truth and you know it, for you struggle with this ‘mould’ whenever it makes its pass every now and then. Anyway, it was my desire, not your failure and indeed ‘late’ as it were, it is still infinitely better than never. Thank you John
Well you were a refreshing change; no airs, what you see is what you get, full of earnest enthusiasm and not caught in the brownie points syndrome. Well my good man, I’m no sage but perhaps as my dear late mom used to say, ‘like a dog you slog around the clock, but with little to show at the end of it all.’ (in malayalam of course)- and I would respond, ‘for it is not the end yet mom’!
Don’t worry unduly about remembering all the ‘magic’ that we convey with the greatest of sincerity to the world around us. If we do, then we will need to stop at the first ‘magic’. Life I suppose Is about living, not the fear of failing or forgetting. Nature is so kind and well programmed, that when we deviate or falter, she has a way of waking us up or pulling us back, without ever restraining our freedom! Such a wonderful working model given to human kind, but for want of power over another, we keep ignoring or rejecting this natural model of excellence for our own fallible ones of comparatives and competition.
Am in the middle of editing our next issue which must go to print by Saturday – and thus this reply so late in the day. Was working out my talkset for China Airlines which I will record later at 1030 hrs and chanced upon Lou Pearlman, the guy who became the boy band mogul after his success with the Backstreet Boys – responsible for so much ‘success’ and discovering talent that the world would have completely missed; and yet it all started in the evil heart and fraudulent mind of Lou Pearlman! History is littered with such anomalies, but nature judges not. It simply goes on, and evolves. However, humans do.
Being involved now in the ‘environment’ scene I am amused as I’m equally irked sometimes with all these ‘causes and campaigns’ that sprout like mushrooms everywhere. Veiled in goodness, but sourced in mindless fear. Yet to publicly decry this would be equally foolish, which I do declare from personal experience. Being ‘right’ need not necessarily be right. But pragmatism without morals is no better either; then the end will always justify the means however ruthless or cruel. This is not new to you John; I’m merely echoing what I sense in you. We will fail by our own rules; but nature never punishes us; it’s but a perception. She is there to always to redeem us if we will let her; guilt is an alert for the moment inviting us to lift from fear to love, not to live in eternal damnation.
You are good man John with a good head on strong shoulders with a big heart in the right place. Your children will teach you more than you would’ve learnt from scholars and paragons; another one of nature’s quirky gifts. I wish you great joy being the parent.
Cheers mate! Joe
4th Sept 09
My dear John,
Despair not, your very kind words have redeemed you from my earlier disappointment! Ha x3.
Was rather bushed last night and decided to rest my tired and aging body; and awake this morning to a lovely email from you. Thank you John.
That we allow the greatness within each being, human or otherwise to manifest in our lives is perhaps the fundamental secret of the child that escapes the adult; and we were all children sometime in our lives. Fortunate then you are that this secret has not escaped you.
My congratulations on your new post at the NIE. Rick Warren's (Purpose Driven Church/Life) interpretation of Moses' calling to the burning bush, and God bestowing upon him the powers he needed for the given mission through what he held in his hands....the shepherd's staff, comes to mind. Often while we pursue and strive to reach the glittering stars above, sometimes we forget the beautiful flowers at our feet. Well at least that will not be your folly, for you know what you hold in your hands. My best wishes John!
I came with nothing into this world John, and will probably leave with nothing too; i own nothing. You are free to take and use anything as you wish John; that you have found purpose for my rambling thoughts, i'm honoured as i'm humbled. Enjoy the blogging. In his book, The Element, Ken Robinson's interesting observation of the 10000 hrs or more chalked up by the paragons in any given field, does bear some truth. An erstwhile pathway then to your writing endeavour.
Well my dear friend, before i ramble on again, it leaves me to wish you well and enjoy the gift of parenthood, which is no accident. Much awaits, and it starts with the little act of recognising the greatness in everything around us. The great day ahead awaits the great person who chooses to live it. Live it bro!
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